One Tiny Person

I keep a private journal that I write in every night.  It’s my way of letting the day’s ups and downs go so that I can rest easy… well, easy-ish.  I have always been a person whose brain just cannot shut off and if I do not commit to nighttime rituals it is impossible for me to fall asleep.  I have a feeling Greyson may end up being the same way if his current anti-sleep campaign is any indication.  Much of my nightly writings have revolved around the tiny boy that keeping me up at night.

Having a child has been the most profound experience of my life.  As soon as I held him in my arms, I became a different person.  Instantly, I had an intense understanding about what is truly important in life.  After the first week of baby blues went away I found myself smiling more and letting go of things that pre-baby drove me crazy.  He has softened me.  He’s made my world brighter.  Sure, it sounds trite but it also true.

One week old. He was sooo tiny! Look at those scrawny legs!

In his (almost) 5 months in this world he has changed so much in my life.  And I don’t mean the little things like being sleep-deprived, the complete inability to do anything more than 30-45 minutes at a time, or becoming a master diaper changer.  No, he’s done much more than that.

Showing off those mad Gonzalez keyboard skillz. =P

His birth created a family.  Ramses and I have always been partners and best friends but now we are a real family.  He made me a Mommy and he made Ramses a Daddy.  He’s become a bridge for several relationships that we felt had, maybe, run their course.  He’s taught me to get out of my head and open my heart.  He well never really understand the profound effect he’s had on our lives until maybe he has children of his own.  But that’s OK, his only job right now is to be a kid for as long as he can.

Funny Faces

Things have been pretty hectic in my world these days.  Work have been a maelstrom.  So much so I, embarrassingly, was brought to tears on the phone with a jerk client last week.  I had just reached my breaking point.  I’ve been juggling so much between an office in the midst of an audit, insurance compliance issues, new projects, and overly-demanding clients.  A home that has a never-ending to-do list and a major flooring project underway.  And not to mention, oh, I don’t know… being a (first-time!) Mommy to a 4 month old.  It’s hard to be everything to everyone, especially when my heart is wanting nothing more than to cuddle with my baby all day long.   I know I can strike the balance, it’s just going to take longer than 4 months.

Greyson demonstrating how I felt about last week.

The weekend and the relative rest it brought was much-needed.  Ramses started demoing the formal living room floor and laid the first planks of our new flooring.  I cannot tell you how long I have been wanting wood floors in the house.   During the design of our house we wanted to add the flooring badly but our budget was limited so we opted for upgrading the cabinets, fireplace, and stairs.  This August will be 6 years of homeownership and the floors are truly our first really big project.  While Ramses got his manual labor on, Greyson and I spent the day bonding and laughing together.  His little face is enough to erase every crappy thing that’s on my mind.

The many faces of adorable.

Sunday morning we took a break from the flooring to play some games with Matt & Robert.  It was really nice to spend time with friends and I am looking forward to making these get-togethers a weekly thing, our Church of the Breakfast Table, if you will.  Having a social life and devoting time to just have fun is really important when the majority of our time is spent working.  It is amazing how different my time is divided now and if I do not make time for certain things, they may never actually happen.  Having a child is a joy and the sacrifice of personal time is worth it but I am a firm believer that I can have it all.  It just takes some fancy, acrobatic scheduling and a little bargaining. Last night,  I actually cracked a book that wasn’t a parenting or baby book for the first time in, gosh… 6 months?!  By the way, book one of Fablehaven is excellent so far.  I loves me some kid’s fantasy books. =)

Ramses pulling some double duty.

I just had to share the picture above.  I asked Ramses if he could take a break so I could go switch out a load of laundry and I came downstairs to find this.  I guess he was on a roll and a break wasn’t in the cards.  Greyson LOVES to watch his Daddy.  No one can make him laugh more than Ramses.  They are simpatico.  I think that Grey will have Ramses’ sense of humor which makes me so happy.  I am looking forward to watching their relationship as he grows up.  I makes me so happy that Ramses has taken so easily to being a father.  Greyson is truly lucky to have him.  And I am pretty sure that he already knows that…

The precious sight I woke up to this morning.

*rake, rake*

I can hardly believe that it’s been a year since I tended to the Leaves & Branches!  And what a year I have had!  About five weeks after my last entry I found out I was pregnant.  The year that followed has been a whirlwind.  Fast forward to today and you will find a very tired, very happy new Mommy.  My son, Greyson, will be 4 months old on the Fourth of July.

"Hello, World! It's me, Greyson... prepare to be conquered!"

Life doesn’t slow down once a baby enters the picture but I am finding ways to make the most of my sporadic chunks of free time.  I am hoping that blogging can make it’s way back into my routine.  I have been weighing the benefits of getting back behind the keyboard for this blog for about a month now.  Since my time is such a precious commodity these days prioritizing is more important than ever.  Obviously, you can see that I have, indeed, decided to try and start posting again.  The number one reason why I decided to try is because my little boy is already growing up so fast and I wanted a place to hold all my thoughts, my photos, and my memories.  And this, I feel, is the best place for it.  It’s also a plus to be able to share what it means for me to me a new Mom.

3 1/2 months old and chillin' in his Jumperoo.

Now, don’t worry not every post will be about the boy.  I will probably share the same types of things I have in the past as well as the countless home improvement projects that we always seem to have on the docket.

I started “nesting” somewhere around my 7^th month of pregnancy.  The result?  Converting our loft into a nursery.  Converting our spare room into a craft room.  A complete bedroom re-do.  A refresh of our mantle and new holiday décor for every major holiday to decorate it with (gotta make everything special for the boy after all.)  A hall family photo gallery.  A new theme in my home office.  And those are just the completed projects.  So, what’s in the future?  New laminate flooring throughout.  A complete exterior refresh including painting our front door and shutters black.  New sectional sofa for our family room which will most likely result in some new paint.  New landscaping in our side planters and the front.  And a list of other half-thought-out projects.  Whew!  My poor husband.

So, check back every now and then, or subscribe in whatever your preferred method may be, or even check on Facebook I’ll be posting there when I update.